Flower in the rain

I don’t know how to feel, momma… I don’t know what to say?
I try to smile sometimes, but I just can’t make it stay…
I know it’s been a while, but I don’t understand,
why did he do it, what did I do to them?
All I ever did was love, all I ever did was laugh…
but now I can’t see today, through this stain in my past.
Sometimes I just wonder, is this even real?
Why did he do it momma, how come he doesn’t feel?
Did someone hurt him? How do I forgive?
Was he angry at me, was it something I did?
There are so many questions, I just don’t understand,
I find it so hard now, to trust any man.
Momma, please don’t cry, don’t shed any tears,
I know I’ll find healing in each passing year.
I know you never meant for him to hurt me like this,
but I need your strength now, to get us through this.
Because in the end, our life we must live…
so I need your strength, teach me to forgive.
I promise to grow, through this hurt and pain
and reach for the sunshine, like a flower in the rain.



- Dedicated to April’s flowers, Natasha and Jasmine -

Here I am

Here I am…

Giving to you all that’s worth giving,
for you have made my whole life worth living.
My heart, my love, my body, my mind…
My faith, my fears, my trust, my time…

You’ve given to me this gift of you,
so I give you myself, in all that is true
I don’t need the fortunes, and perks of this life
I’d trade it for you, and wouldn’t think twice

Just having you near me, is more than enough
but when it comes to you, I can’t get enough…
I need you, I breathe you, I love you, adore you,
and when I’m with you all that I want is more you.

So here I am…

Returning the love that you’ve given to me,
the best that I have, I’m now driven to be.
not for moments, or years, but eternity
my love is my gift I give eternally

May it never run dry no matter the years
with my hand in yours, I can face any fears
we’ve been through the thick and been through the thin
but this day, our journey will truly begin

No matter what comes or goes, or how the wind blows
when life is uncertain, there’s one thing you’ll know
when the darkness is looming, when it’s hard to stand,
You can look to your side, forever I am

- Dedicated to James and Olivia. –

May JAH smile on your lives and your union be blessed forever

Can't you see?

Can’t you see?

Everybody wants out this gutter, it’s in our nature to want more…
we’re all tired of scraping at the bottom, and eating scraps from their floor.

Why can’t our children have the best teachers, the best schools, clean streets…
Why we have to struggle so hard, just to make our ends meet?

See, everybody has dreams, no matter how small or how great
and some or trying to reach them in spite of the choices they make.

But can’t you see? It a consequence that follows every decision
that’s why we, make up over 85% percent of convictions…

Can’t you see… we are the last on the list, at the back of the bus
in a society where cash rules everything around us.

Cuz when it comes down to the bottom line, we just aint got enough…
so if you family is broke, or you from here here… you just out of luck…

At least that’s what they bankin’ on… can’t you see?
cuz if you got the drive to thrive, they’ve put a plan inside for you and me…

An easy way to change our today, but they hope you don’t see…
when they catch you slippin, lock you up, and then throw away the key…

If you aint sellin you usin, trying to escape this tragic reality…
either way they don’t expect for us to rise up from these streets.

Can’t you see… the truth is loud and clear and it’s right before your eyes…
everytime we put fire to this substance we inhale genocide…

It’s not even about black and white, this is all about status
cuz it done snatched the whitest of white on to blackest of blackest.

The hood is just practice, it’s a much grander scheme
eliminating any one trying to achieve this false dream… can’t you see?

When the stocks on my very life or worth more locked up than free
privatizing, commercializing, this is modern day slavery…

oh, yes, we talkin free labor, we talkin selling and trading…
all the while our very existence is steadily fading… can’t you see?

It’s high time we opened up our eyes and faced the truth
cuz in a minute its gone be over, by that time… what’s the use?

Can’t you see?

Pressed

My strength is dissipating, as if my soul wishes to die,
This gloom consumes my inner light as a bound up butterfly.
This life has lost its meaning, I am searching for a reason…
to make my presence worth the oxygen that I am breathing.
Why can’t I be better? Why can’t I fill a purpose?
all that I am in this hour looks to me as though it’s worthless…
never enough love, enough money, enough need…
and those depending on this shell, could do better than me?
I have been limited to my contributions, its never been enough,
its seems that I bring misery to everyone one I touch.
Some may call this depression, and that raised the inner question
is it I that caused this turmoil for the “de” before my pressing?
It hit me like a ton of bricks, shed light upon my pain…
I am my own catalyst, the creator of my change.
My lack of fight against myself, this messed up way of thinking,
has left me in this gloomy pit, each day further sinking.
I lost the “de” and I just PRESSED, and that gave me an “im”
and now this light, it burns so bright, no longer is it dim.
I added “sur” to all my doubt, and did away with “o”
this brought a “re” to all the joy that once inside me showed.
all this mess, and all this stress, this pain inside my chest
was remedied with one swift move, see I just had to PRESS

Because of you...

Your smile is all it took… to allow me to see past the rain,
like sunshine breaking through these ominous clouds of my pain…
hope regained, mind rearranged, like a rushing flood washing my stains…
so now… I look at you… and I see joy once again.

Your laugh, your laugh was enough to bring me in from the cold,
sheltering me with the nurturing warmth of your soul…
replacing, and erasing, the old through embracing
of your joy wrapped around me like… like my favorite blanket.

Your voice… oh baby your voice... melting over my mind like hot butter
warming my body, in a way like no other…
shaking the very framework of my soul like thunder,
girl if you don’t stop talkin to me like that… ooohhhh… its gonna be trouble…

Cuz all of you has givin me back a passion I’ve been lackin…
revived the man inside and sent all my negative packin
girl you just so attractive from the inside to outside
that all that’s on my mind is getting you down on my side…

Right now my eyes is opened so wide… and all I see is you…
when you look at me with those eyes, your light shines all the way through
all the way to the marrow, to the core of my truth
and with you I feel so free, that I just gotta let loose

I just gotta do me baby… I can’t hold back any longer…
cuz with each passing moment my infatuations grow stronger
my strides getting longer, so resist this… I’m through…
and your smile is all it took… girl it’s all because of you…

A mystery to me...

She’s a mystery to me… I can’t figure this one out…
I’m 50% optimistic, and I’m 50% doubt.
She know I’m feelin her, cuz my hearts on my sleeve…
but how she really feels… that’s a mystery to me.

I’d be cool with being friends, though I confess that I want more,
I know that I could be that one, that she’s been searching for.
she’s got everything I look for, she’s got everything I need,
but how she really feels… that’s a mystery to me.

Why she keeps her heart secluded? I don’t know for sure.
she avoids those little questions, that could open up a door.
but yet she shows me interest, even hints at what could be…
but how she really feels… that’s a mystery to me.

Sometimes I feel she’s running, when she feels she’s got too close,
maybe she’s just skeptical, her heart in fear of being broke.
I confess I have the same fears, so that much I can see…
but how she really feels… that’s a mystery to me.

I wish that she’d just open up, trust me that much just to share,
maybe I could put to rest, some of the fear and doubt that’s there?
but till she takes that first step, I just have to let it be…
cuz how she really feels… that’s a mystery to me.

I’m not trying to have the answers… to all she is right now,
but if I at least knew what’s on her mind it’d ease my doubt.
cuz I don’t want to rush things, it’s just I want to see,
how she really feels… cuz it’s a mystery to me.

I’m giving the benefit of doubt to all the signs that say just “chill”
but if I pretended I wasn’t feelin her, then I would not be real.
so ill just keep on looking, hoping one day that I’ll see,
and how she really feels, won’t be a mystery to me.

A whole nother world

Kiss me again…
let me feel that warm sensation rushing through my veins just like fire
let me feel every hair stand at attention with this ascension of my desire.
words can’t even comprise a, close relation of what I feel
when your lips connect with mine, it seems just too good to be real…
now I’m burning to feel, again the way I felt last night
like an addict in search of a fix, I can’t go without it one more night
baby something just aint right, I think that somethings trapping me
my mind is lost some place between whats real and fantasy…
only you can set me free… by the source that holds me captive
longing to taste your lips again has got my whole world spinning backwards
my whole mindset is packed with fantasies of you and me…
me showing you my gratitude for this gift you’ve given me.
so girl you best believe, im takin note of all I owe
and I’ll pay back every bit to every inch from head to toe
I can pay you thirty fold… no I don’t mind paying with interest
cuz you have all my interest, throw some time up on my sentence
girl my mind is steady spinnin… like your lips laced with patrone
the way your lips taste got me gone… I need your lips placed on my own
its ok, cuz we both grown, and I aint scared to break it down…
let me kiss you on your neck until I hear that moaning sound…
feels so good it shakes the ground, but baby this is just the start,
cuz my lips plan on exploring every piece of every part
just increasing every spark, until I set your mind ablaze
you got me thinkin of love makin girl in oh so many ways
baby I would need some days, maybe weeks to oust this fiyah
and every thought I have of you, it just makes my passion higher…
let me stare into your eyes, and gently brush my lips on yours
let me tease you till you can’t wait for what daddy has in store
what you’ve imagined, I got more than what your mind could ever see
when I unleash all of this passion caged up deep inside of me
its gonna be a whole new world, here, it’s only you and me
fragrances we’ve never smelt and colors we have never seen
a new sensitivity to every sound and every touch
in this world it’s you and me, and baby all we need is us…